The Naked Advice

Model & Writer Liz LaPoint answers your questions about dating, sex, and relationships

J.S. wrote:I have a ball busting fetish and I need to know if that is normal.

Liz says: Normal as in typical or common? No. Normal as in not mentally ill? Probably.

There are no research studies on this particular sexual kink/fetish, but you can find plenty of speculative opinions by experts and participants online about why a ball busting fetish develops, what it means, and whether or not it’s physically damaging. If you haven’t viewed it yet, I made a video for my channel on this fetish. Click here to watch!

Your fetish falls under S&M, sadomasochism. Having fantasies of someone overpowering you and being submissive, dominated, and physically “punished” is a common thing, but it’s the way it expresses itself with you that is less common. As far as being mentally ill or normal, there have been some accounts by men with this fetish and their therapists that after taking anti-depressants their fetish waned. Some suspect they were actually depressed and the fetish was a symptom of it, and others weren’t depressed but a side effect of some anti-depressants is a lowered libido, so the lack of interest in their fetish was simply incidental. You can read about this here, and here.

As I mention in my video, anytime someone’s sexual activities involve self-harm, it will understandably raise some eyebrows. But whether or not the activities are a disorder will depend on many factors. Click here to read what the DSM-5 says is a fetishistic disorder and about treatment options.

 

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